BOOM POW SURPRISE

Hello folks.

I apologize if the last post was offensive or seemed different from my usual ramblings, I was drunk. Kudos to Embo though for being an excellent typist as well. I should hire a personal assistant so I can dictate all my blogs. And by the way I do not actually hate immigrants.


As I am sure you all know I came home from Europe for the holidays. I enjoyed my time in Europe. I saw some amazing things and I met some very cool people, but I was ready to come home. I decided it would also be the most fun to surprise people. So I did. Surprising people is really fun. I just like blowing peoples minds.
I will never forget the look on some of the peoples faces, namely my parents and seeing JB's jaw drop when he realized it was me. The best reaction came from my 3 year old neice who upon seeing me ran to my arms gave me a hug and started to jump up and down yelling my name.

At this time I would also like to give mention to my brother Paul who was the only member of my family in on the surprise and as part of the deal we made I will now officially make Paul the first Saint of CHRISTIFANITY, Congrats Aikenhead.

I am here until February 9th, so if anybody wants to get together I am available for boozing, drinking, partying, wine tastings, beerfests, and other social activities.

Later
Neltoid

Christifanity vs. lambs navy Rum

it is the day after christmas and i am currently drunk with my good friends mike, deanna and EMBO, weve been playing a little mariokart as well as smoking some players, and doin some shots, and having some general merriment. We are about to go out to meet some dude EMBO knows, and i am going to grill him on being a jackass. Hopefully i can make this young lad change his jackass ways through the power of Christifanity. I believe i will be successful cause' im really cocky. In conclusion, Id like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas, and NOT a happy Holiday, because happy holidays is part of the war on Christmas. I also do not like Feliz Navidad because I hate immigrants. EMBo rocks the nation. and she is an excellent typest. peace and love. The Neltoid.

Tis' The Season To Be Drinking

Hello everybody

I hope your holiday season is going smoothly. Mine has been pretty relaxing, you know beaches, sangria, hot spanish ladies that kind of thing. I am currently in the town of Alicante which is on the Mediteranian Sea. This is a big tourist town and it is crazy busy for the holidays.


I am staying at a really nice hotel that I found online for a really good price. It has been like a little vacation from my long vacation. I was also able to put my pics on a disc and henceforth on to a computer so I can share with you all. Here are some more.


These pics are of a giant beer I had in Nice, Me in Monaco, and of the beach in Cannes.


Later

cbn

THE PICS




I guess I should explain where the pictures are from. The first one is of me at the Colessium in Rome, the second one is of me at the top of La Sagrada Cathedral in Barcelona. The third one is of Monte Carlo, number four is me riding a cannon at Cardif Bay, and number five is a painting of Gary Coleman's head which is on the side of the train station in Cannes, why is there a painting of Gary Coleman's head on the Cannes train station? good question I personally could not get an answer so I am forced to assume that Gary Coleman is still a huge star in the French Rivierra. I wonder if Gary knows this, I am sure he reads this blog so he will know soon enough.


Lounging in Alicante currently

neltoid

AS PROMISED


First I would like to thank Mike for the recent pictures he sent me. It looks like I had a great time at BC. I hope I have an equally as good of time at the Bachelor party.

I said there would be new pics and I am a man of my word...Enjoy

HELLO. IT'S ME AGAIN


I am bored so therefore I am blogging. Nothing new to report.


If I am not mistaking today is the 15th, this means that Nicole is on her way home as I type this. I am envious. I would love to be home for the holidays. I hope everyone in the crew enjoys BC tomorrow someone eat some bacon for me.

My stomach has been bothering me all day. Especially when I sit. Maybe my hernia is exploding(just a joke mom). It is probably gas or something I am sure it will pass with a good nights sleep and no drinking tonight. I usually do not put personnal things like this on my blog, but hey, got to type something.

I appreciated the CHRIStmas greetings Luke.

I am guaranteeing new pictures on my next post. If I don't have new pics up may my hernia explode(again, mom I am fine, stop worrying).


Feliz Navidad in 10 days

neltoid

HOWDY Y'All



Barcelona is a cool city. Yesterday I went and checked out the Sagrada Cathedral. It was built by an architect who was a devout catholic and it is bizzare, but at the same time beautiful. I have some pictures and I will try and post them next week.

I also went to Las Ramblas which is a crazy pedestrian market in Barcelona. Bought some souveniers.

I do not know for sure where I am venturing to next, but I will be sure to keep you all posted on my whereabouts.


Later y'all

neltodium

WHERE IN THE WORLD IS CHRIS NELSON?


Greetings

Yesterday when I was chatting with Nicole she mentioned I should blog more. I apologize if my lack of blogging for the past week has affected any of you negatively.

Anyways like I said in the last blog I did go up to Florence. It is a beautiful city, it also rained on me there. I still had my cold so I wasn´t as gun-ho as I usually am when I get to a new city, but I did manage to go check out the Duomo and Michalengelo´s David(the most famous sculpture in the world). It was much more impressive in person and unlike the Mona Lisa nad the Colesseum it was bigger then expected. I still prefer Chris Nelson´s David(love ya Browntown).

I also had my fair share of delicious gelati while I was in Florence, my favourite being Nutella. Nutella is the most delicious thing in the world. It is like spreading the inside of a Ferrero Rochner on anything(I must give credit for this analogy to Nicole a fellow Nutella lover). I also tried a particularily good pistachio gelati.

Christmas season is in full effect here in the old world. It just doesn´t seem right without snow. Lit up palm trees? what the hell!

Well that´s it for now.

Later peeps

Neltoid





Oh Yeah, the answer of the title is?
Barcelona

CHRISTIFANITY vs CATHOLICISM


Today I ventured to Vatican city. I saw St peters Basilica which was very impressive andd huge.

I tried to get a face to face meeting with Pope Benedict, but apparently he is not man enough to have a sit down with a leader of a true religion. I bet John Paul would have seen me, he was a totally better Pope.

I also went and saw the Colessium. Very cool to see in person, not as large as I thought it would be. I would have been a kickass Gladiator

Off to Florence tomorrow

later

Maximus Nelson

ROME IF YOU WANT TOO


One of the good things about me having a eurailpass is that I can go to places on a whim, and that is what I did yesterday. I am currently in Rome, it is very impressive, imagining being in a place where everytime you walk around the corner there is some kind of really old building or statue or church(lots of churches) I have not been able to see much of the really cool stuff because during my whim to come to Rome I developed a nasty cold. I am shocked that I had not gotten one earlier, I think I used my mental powers to ward off the cold until now(The 11 hour train trip weakened my mental powers). So I have been taking it easy, little walks here and there, but that is about it, I am hoping that I feel well enough tomorrow so I can go check out Vatican City and the Colosseum(I think I might do one of the cheesy tourist buses like Luker and I did in London). I am here until Thursday then I think I am going to go checkout Florence.

later
cb neltoid

WHY DOES IT ALWAYS RAIN ON ME?


Greetings from the French Riveira. I have been in Nice for the past few days. The first day I got here it was beautiful. I sat on the beach and had some beers. Yesterday started out great the weather was alright and I hopped a train to Monaco. Monaco is amazing, the views are spectacular. I saw the royal palace and the exotic garden which has over 1000 varieties of cactus. It then started to rain and I did not have my umbrella because I figured it would be nice in the French Riveira so I left my umbrella in Wales because Nicoles was all mangled and didnt really work. Last time I do something nice for anyone.

Today it did not rain much, but everything was wet everywhere. I went to Cannes today and you could tell that they had a major downpour. This area is so funny, everyone has had a facelift and they all have small dogs. I think I am going to hang around this area for a little longer, maybe checkout northern Italy a bit before I go to Spain.

Later
cb neltoid

C	Cuddly
H	Happy
R	Realistic
I	Intelligent
S	Stunning
T	Tame
I	Inspirational
F	Furious
A	Appealing
N	Neat
I	Irresistible
T	Tempting
Y	Yum

Name / Username:

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

HEY


It has been a pretty tame Monday here. Nicole made the easy decison to take it easy last night so we did not drink(we had drinks with supper, not crazy drinking). The beer and cider festival on Saturday was a lot of fun. I assume that many of you have gone to Nicole's blog and checked out the video's, if you havn't go do so.

Yesterday we went down to Cardiff Bay with a bunch of Nicole's friends from school to witness a tree lighting ceremony at a Norwegian church. The Norwegian politicain who was going to light the tree brought up a local little girl to help him light the tree. There was suppose to be a big countdown, but the little girl lit the tree prematurely and has now ruined Christmas for all the Welsh and myself. I maybe exagerating a little. After the tree was lit and the Norwegian national anthem was sung a bunch of Norwegian exchange students and local Cardiff children took part in the Norwegian tradition of dancing around the tree. This is a tradition I will be brining back to Saskatoon next Christmas. This Christmas I will dance around a bottle of Jack Daniels on a beach in the Alicante region of Spain.

Now here are some pics that I did yesterday when I was bored on the computer.







ABC yeah

I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED MY DRUNK PHONE CALLS


Last night Nicole and I did a little bar hopping here in Cardiff. It was fun, Nicole spilt a rum and coke in her purse and almost got puked on by some dude. When we got home we decided it would be prudent to call some friends back home. I got a hold of Dave, Twyla an Eli and had a nice chat. Mike and Deanna wern't home so I left a drunken message, but I got to talk to Mike just a few minutes ago. We also video chatted with Luker. I also had a drunk MSN chat with Jeff on Thursday. Nicole and I have been drinking regularly.


Good Luck to the Huskies in the Vanier today


Here are some more pics

I believe they are of a fountain in Luccerne a swan in Luccerne, the Hungarian parliament, and the top of Notre Dame cathedral.


See yeah friends, (Nicole and are hitting the Beer and Cider festival tonight)

Hey everybody, here are some new pics from my travels. The picture of me is in Geneva, The wrestling statue was in Luccerne, I also think there is one from the eiffel tower and one of the Louvre and also one of Interlaken

Cheers
christopher

BACK IN CARDIFF



Greetings everyone, I am back in Wales. I got in late last night.


I believe that last thing I blogged about was beerhalls in Munich, Right? anyways here is what has happened since.


I went back to the Hofbrauhaus in Munich on my last night there, this time I brought along a fellow Canadian dude and two American chicks. I had more beer and more beer. It was great.

Then I got myself up after about 4 hours sleep and caught an 8 hour train to Berlin. My first day in Berlin I walked around and saw the Brandenburg gate and the remaining part of the Berlin Wall. The next day I went to Sachsenhaus which was a Concentration Camp just outside of the city. When you have just read and seen things on TV and movies about the Holocaust you think about how awful it was, but when you are standing in the place where hundreds of thousands of people were murdered it puts it in a whole new reality. It was a very somber day.


The next day I had to catch a train to Amsterdam so I could I could catch my late night flight to Cardiff. During the train ride we stopped in this small town for a really long time. Everyone was wondering what was going on. Then over the speakers a dude said that there was an unattended backpack on the train platform, if it was somebody's please go claim it. Nobody claimed the backpack. So every passenger on the train had to get moved to the two ends of the train because they thought it might be a bomb. Luckily I was in one of the last cars already and I got to sit down an wait for this to all unfold. I was also by a window so I got to look out and see the bag in question, I also got to see the guys with machine guns and scary looking dogs on the platform. After an hour of waiting around, One of the guys who was in the car with me looks out and realizes it's his backpack. Biggest idiot of the day. So he went and claimed the bag. The rail officials were not to impressed with this guy, neither were any of the passengers. I then finally made it to Amsterdam. Because of the delay I did not have much time to walk around and do some souvenier shopping. So I went to the airport and hopped my plane to Cardiff.

I am here for a week. Nicole has some fun stuff planned for us, mostly involving alcohol. It should be glorious

later friends and family

chris neltoid

'Beer Has Been Scientifically Linked To Falling Down'--William Nelson


Hello all

I am currently in Munich Germany, the heart of Bavaria.

I am still amazed at the weather I have been getting here in the east. The sun is always shining. There are occasional bursts of rain, but they are few and far between.

Last night I went to the Hofbrauhaus, the most famous of all the beerhalls here in Munich. The place is crazy. It is a giant room with everyone drinking giant beers. We need a beerhall in the Toon. Maybe I will open one. I have to also point out that German beer is really strong. Let us just say I was a bit inebriated after two giant beers. But do not worry dad, I did not fall down.

I am here for one more night and then I am going to go to Berlin for a couple days before I go back to Wales to see Nico.

Unfortunately I could not make it to Rome for the TomKat wedding. Hopefully I can make it to Tom Cruise's next wedding.

Until the next time I feel inspired to type
Neltodium

BUDA BUDA BUDA PEST



Greetings my blog family


I am currently in the city of Budapest. It is a large crazy city. I was expecting it to be kind of dirty and more eastern european, but it is actually quite clean and modern. It was also a beautiful day here today. I didn't do much touristy things today, mostly walked around my neighbourhood. Tomorrow I am going to go check out parliament and the chain bridge and maybe castle hill. I will also try and find this labrynth Twyla told me about. Do you remember what it is near twyla?

Before Budapest I was in Vienna Austria. I really dug Vienna, it was a big city, but it wasn't noisy and it seemed really laid back. I checked out the famous cathedral there, it was impressive, but no Notre Dame. Apparently this cathedral has been continually under construction since the 1700's. As I was leaving I noticed that everyone was blessing themselves with the holywater. And as you all know I do as the locals do, so I blessed myself. It kind of burned afterwards, What does that mean?
After that I went to the Hofurg Palace which was impressive. I chilled by some cool statues of some Austrian dudes.

I am in Budapest until Friday, then I am off to Munich then Berlin, before I head back to Wales. I have changed up my plans so that I am going to two countries I hadn't planned on going after I come back from Wales. man I love travelling.

Eternally yours

The Neltoid

THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH COLD AND WETNESS

Salzburg has been very miserably cold. This has made it a bit hard to explore, but I have done my best. Tomorrow I am going to Vienna, and after that Budapest.

I have booked a place to stay for Christmas, it looks like my dream of being drunk on a beach is going to come true. More details to come towards Christmas

I am running out of time so I will cut this blog short.

Check you later

neltoid

CATCHING SOME ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ's in ZURICH


I am currently in Zurich. It is a pretty tame city, very business oriented. So what do you do when you are in a boring city and you have already paid for 3 nights in your hostel? You take day trips. Today I went to Luzern also known as Lucernne (Like the milk) It is a beautiful town on lake Geneva. Unfortunately it was a bit rainy today, so I bought an umbrella. I walked around Luzern, took a bunch of pictures. Tomorrow I am going to either Bern or Interlaken. Interlaken is suppose to be amazing, that's why I'm leaning towards it.

There is a dude in my dorm room here who I think has been living in this dorm room for a long time. He's very old and he has crap every where around the room. He has bags full of newspapers in every corner of this 6 person dorm. There is a medium sized dresser between his bed and mine and all three droors are filled with random crap, like beer bottle caps and old phone cards. At first this guy really creeped me out(I think it was the muttering to himself) but now I feel sorry for this old guy. Being that old and having your entire life in a dorm in a hostel. If this ever happens to me, somebody please take me in.

Well my time in Switzerland is coming to an end. The sceneary in this country is amazing. It is worth coming here just to look around at the landscape. I have also noticed that the Swiss have a thing for fountains. There are fountains everywhere.

Saturday I'm off to Austria. First stop Salzburg, home of the Sound of Music. Apparently there are Sound of Music tours, we'll see how bored I get.

Later
Me, a name I call myself

"THE GENEVA CONVENTIONS ARE QUAINT"--US Attorney General Alberto Gonzales


Alberto is right the Geneva Conventions are quaint, because this is a nice little quaint town. It is quiet here, which is a complete 180 from Paris. I enjoy a little quiet once and awhile. It's kind of cool when you walk down the street and you look to your left and in the distance you can see the Swiss Alps. I often have moments where I just can't believe I'm in some of these places.

Congrats to the Riders. Take that Calgary!
Was Gainer allowed on the sidelines?, someone let me know. It sucks that I am missing so many good sporting events like the CFL playoffs, The NFL, The start of the NBA season, Hockey, man I miss hockey, all they play here is "football", many people here also call it soccer though. What makes this worse is knowing that my stepbrother is watching all these things on a 50 inch high definition television. Damn you Paul! I take comfort in knowing that I will be back in time for NBA and NHL playoffs as well as March Madness

I also really miss LOST. Dave keeps on teasing me with little comments like LOST is so good this season and it's also sad. So many scenarios have gone through my head. It takes all the strength inside of me to not go look up what's going on online.

What else has happened recently? ummmm, oh yeah, Saddam got sentenced to death by hanging. Bush must have loved that. He does love the death penalty and I bet if he could have hung some people while he was Governor of Texas he would have.

Well I'm off to the UN

later
the toid

I CONQUERED THE TOWER


Tonight is my last night here in Paris. So many places in Europe are hyped up and some live up to it and some don't. Paris definately does. This place is amazing.


Yesterday I went to the Louvre. I saw the Mona Lisa, the most famous peice of art in the world. It was a lot smaller then I had envisioned. The Louvre is huge. There is so many cool things to check out, including the Venis Demilo, which was impressive. There was also a mummy. Lots of other cool statues as well. My favourite being the one of Hercules.

Today I went up the eiffel tower. It was large and pretty cool. The view, as you all can imagine is breath taking. I went all the way to the top. I saw all the sights of Paris, like the Arc de Triumph, Oh Napoleon, you so crazy. I got a warm feeling in my heart knowing that I was in the very place where Tom Cruise preposed to Katie Holmes.

Tomorrow I am on a train at 710am to Geneva.

Luke, I got you a France patch, as you requested

Later.

cbn

PARIS BABY

I have traded tea and scones for red wine and croissants



I have landed in one of the world's greatest cities. And I must admit it is pretty amazing here.

Now a quick recap:


Spent a couple of days in Cardiff, it is very nice there. I am actually going back in late November for the Beer and Cider festival(I found a cheap flight). Then The Luker and I went to London for a day. London was a really cool city, I would have loved to spend more time there, but I also love having some money in my pocket, very expensive. 3 pounds for one ride on the tube.
Luke and I took a double decker bus tour of London, we got to see all the major sights, including the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace.

Luke took off Home yesterday and I caught a bus to Paris. The bus trip was alright. I got some sleep. The giant ferry over the English Channel was very cool. I got into Paris at night and quickly figured out the metro system, very easy. I was pretty tired so I just chilled out the first night. Today I walked around Paris. I also went to Notre Dame Cathedral. I could stare at the stain glass for hours. Tomorrow I'm thinking I will hit the Louvre and maybe some other museums. And Saturday I am Eiffel Tower bound.

Sunday I am going to Geneva Switzerland. The home of the European headquarters of the UN. I hope Kofi's there.

later
the neltoid

Hello my people.

I hope you guys like the pictures. If you would like to see more pics from Bath, please feel free to click onto Nicole's blog, she has posted a few pics, including one particularily embarasing picture of me and my hair.

HOWDY PARTNERS

Here are some pics from Bath

LONDON CALLING


So much to talk about.


I left Bruge for Brussels. I sat next to a man with horrible BO. But who am I to talk.

Got to Brussels and got harrased by the UK immigration Bitch. She corrected me on how to say Newfoundland. I got through that ordeal. And I boarded a train to London where I met the man reading over my shoulder this very second, Luke Ryalls. We had a beer in London before we hopped a bus to Bath where we met Nicole. The three of us tore up Bath. That city will never be the same.

We are now in Cardiff so Luke can pick up his stuff before he comes home. Luke and I are going to London tomorrow where we plan to punch the queen.

More updates to come, including pictures

I Killed My Knees


Brugge has turned out to be a giant drinking-fest. My two dorm mates are these two aussies named Alex and Jason. All three of us have been travelling alone, and our first night here in Brugge we decided to go out and have a couple beers at the bar at the hostel. This is where we met Claire another Aussie and Maude who is French. The five of us decided to go to central Brugge where we found a little club, that wasn't to impressive. Apparently Monday nights arn't big drink nights, but we made the best of it, thanks to tequilla.

The next day the five of us went and had a Belgium waffles, which were delicious, we also walked around the city a lot, and then we decided to climb the 366 step Belfry here in Brugge. If you are ever in Brugge I recommend doing it, you get an incredible view. After that we went to the Choclate Museum. Did you know choclate prevents cavities? I didn't. We also saw a demonstation on how choclate is made and of course there was free choclate.

As we were walking back to the hostel my knees started to feel funny, jello legs. Luckily an hour long nap and a little stretching and I was all ready to go drink the night away. Which I did. We met some Kiwi's(New Zealanders) at the hostel and we took them to the club we went the night before. The bartender at the club bought us all shots, I guess we were considered regulars. We ended the night with some Belgium frittens (fries). Apparently they were invented here and you are never suppose to call them French Fries.

Next stop London and Bath.

later
cbn

Brugge or Bust


I have just landed in Brugges. It is a beautiful day here.

Brussels was alright. It is a very noisy city. The best part of Brussels was the Grand Market. It is a very cool square with shops and museums. A lot of old buildings. I ate some delicious belgian chocolate and drank some delicious belgian beer.

I had a private room in Brussels which was awesome. My last night in Amsterdam I had a full 12 people in the dorm and between the two people tag team snoring and the annoying Austrailian guy listening to techno music, I was ready to snap.

I hope everyone is doing well. Keep sending the emails and blog comments. It's great hearing news from home.

Later

nelsonium (the most precious element in the world

Leaving Nether-Nether-lands



Tonight is my last night here in this very interseting country. I have many memories. The giant park in Rotterdam, the giant hookers in the Red Light District, and the giant statues of Emperial Japan I just saw at the Van Gogh Museum.

The Van Gogh Museum was a very cool experience. Along with the large collection of some amazing works by Van Gogh, there was also a large exhibit on Emperial Japan. Great statues, vases, and paintings. Van Gogh did some very cool Japan inspired work. My favourite period had to be the time he spent in Southern France. Great Paintings.

Today was a much different day then yesterday. Today was Van Gogh and amazing art, yesterday was The Sex Museum(there's so much I don't know) and the Hash, Marijaunna, and Hemp Museum. The Pot Museum was basically a building full of pro-marijaunna propaganda. It is right next to a greenhouse and I did get to see some very large plants.

Tomorrow I'm off to Brussels, to work on my beer muscles.


neltoid

Lazy Day In Amsterdam



Today is a grey and miserable day here in Amsterdam. It has been raining on and off all day. This has kind of ruined my plans to walk to the Van Gogh museum. I think I am going to a couple things that are a bit closer to my hotel. Yesterday I took a canal ride through the city. It was very cool, both literally and figuretively.

Not much else to say. I am looking forward to going to Brussels in Friday. I don't know if I'm more excited about visiting a new country or the fact that I have a private room for 3 days.

One of the things that I have realized here in Amsterdam is that it hard to get things done, I wonder why?

I don't have much time, so this will be short.


i am here until friday, I am going to Brussels friday, which should be intersting. then to Brugge. after that it looks like i'm going to meet Luke and Nicole in England.

I Got A Contact High Walking Down The Street.


I have rolled into Amsterdam. And guess what the first thing I did was, Come On Guess. Weed, hooker, something else Well I'm going to leave it up to every ones imagination.(I actually got lost finding my hotel, that's the first thing I did).

I am also getting a contact high as I write this. My hotel is in the Red Light District, but it is in a quiet area. The only way I can describe the Red Light district is that it is a trip. I don't know how else to describe it. Weird, crazy, bizarre don't do it justice. And its only 1:05pm I can't imagine this place at night.

times runnign out
later

Pass the Dutchie



I have landed here in Rotterdam. It seems like a nice city. Everyone here looks like my dutch uncle. It was cool taking the train today. Some awesome scenic views of Germany and the Netherlands. I am here for a few days before I head down to the red light district and the rest of Amsterdam.

Later

Searching For German Heavy Metal Bars


Hello all.

After getting a good nights sleep last night (15 hours) I am feeling refreshed, and soar. I am soar because my bed is not that comfortable. Who would have thought hostel beds wouldn't be the most comfortable.

Frankfurt is kind of a boring city. I am leaving here early Thursday morning for Rotterdam in the Netherlands. I am spending two days in Rotterdam before I go to Amsterdam. I did some reading on the place I am staying at in Amsterdam. It is called the Bulldog Hotel and it is in The Red Light District. The cafe below the hotel is also the first marijauna cafe in the city. After learning all this I tried to change my reservations because I'm not down with sex or drugs, but alas I could not and I have to stay at this hotel.

From Amsterdam I think I am going to go check out Belgium. I have also been checking out ways to get to Cardiff so I can come see you Nicole. I may take a train from Brussels to London and then London to Cardiff, I'll keep you posted. Maybe I'll be there for Halloween.

Later peeps

The Neltoid Has Landed


Well I am here in Frankfurt Germany. I have been up for the past 14 or so hours and I am starting to feel a little tired. It is 835 in the morning here and I can not check into my room until 2. I made the decision to take a cab to my hostel. This was a great move on my part, why you might ask, because my cab was a mercedes benz and we were going ridiculously fast on the Autoban. It was awesome. My hostel is situated right by the main train station as well as many sex shops and internet cafes. Everything a guy needs.

I was shocked at how fast it seemed my plane rides were. It felt like I barely left Saskatoon before we started landing procedures into Toronto. The Toronto flight was good because there was no one beside me and I got to stretch a bit. I missed time my layover in TO, I thought it was a couple hours it ended up only being like 40 minutes. The plane here to Frankfurt was packed no stretching for this 8 hour flight. I sat beside this nice older guy from Victoria who was on his way to Bucharest.

Flying at night is awesome, about an hour outside of Frankfurt we could see the lights of Amsterdam, it looked amazing. I ended up getting a little sleep on the plane. I unfortunately slept through Nacho Libre staring Jack Black. I will never know whether he got the girl or became a great Luchadore. I was however awake for the Notebook staring McGosling. There love was the strongest love ever.

I am sorry I did not get to see you jeff and kim before I left. Until February.

Well that is it for now.

I love you all

chris

Don't Start To Flex Up In The Discotheque




Tonight is a glorious night, Why? because tonight is the season premeire of the best show on Television LOST. The only crappy part of my trip is that I will be missing LOST, but I have recruited my main man DB to tape all the episodes I will be missing. Your good people DB.

Speaking of my trip I leave on Sunday morning. I land In Frankfurt Germany. I have already booked a place to stay for a few days in Frankfurt. I am staying at a place called The Stay and Learn Hostel and that's what I intend to do.

This Friday October 6th I will be hosting a Chris Nelson Farewell Eurotrash party. All guests will be asked to dress like Eurotrash so I can get use to being around Eurotrash. These are my favourite pictures from my google image search of Eurotrash




I would also like to encourage all my guests to bring some cd's that they think I might enjoy so I can put them on my ipod. I have room for like 6500 more songs.

Jim Dandy To The Rescue



Tonight sucked!

I spent the day babysitting my neice which was fine, but after I dropped her off things just started to suck. As I was driving home I bumped a curb on Taylor and it caused my tire to go flat. Not having CAA coverage and not wanting to pay for a someone to come put the donut on, I decided to change it myself. This is no big deal I know how to change a tire, my dad showed me one night when he got a flat years ago. So as I get out to start the process of jacking the car up it starts to rain heavily. I hate the rain. So I'm getting soaked, but there are still good people in this world, a guy came and gave me an umbrella. I never got his name, but I would like to say thank you to the dude who lives at 34 Cumberland Cres. Your solid in my book.
Because of the flat I missed going to a movie with M&D, sorry guys. And now I have to go to get this wheel fixed and I may have to buy a new rim which would suck.

This has put me in a bad mood, so I've decided to leave the country in a week and a half.

Sincerely
The Neltoid

Oh My God It's A Mirage, I'm Telling Ya'll It's A Sabotage


I promised a politcal blog and I am not the kind of guy who breaks promises. So get ready and enjoy my political venom.

I havn't done a politcal blog in a while, so some of my opinions may be on some older issues.


First lets talk about the destruction of Lebanon by Israel. This was a huge disaster for Israel. They destroyed a country that had already denounced Hezbollah. And the Hezbollah soldiers were able to fend off the mighty Israel army. This is only going to make Hezbollah more bold. This war created more supprt for Hezbollah in Lebanon and it weakens the Israeli position in the region.

Next lets talk about Iran.

If any of you are worried about Iran, don't be. Iran wants nuclear power, for energy. Now the US beleives that we can't give Iran any nuclear capabilities because they might create a Nuclear weapon. All reports coming out of Iran are saying they are far away from acheiving nuclear power for energy and if they are far away from having nuclear power for energy then they are really far away from having nuclear weapons. Not to mention the fact that even if you do create a Nuclear weapon you still have to figure out a way to deploy that weapon. And if they even figured out a way to deploy the weapon, there target would likely be Israel, and I don't think they would de dumb enough to risk a nuclear war with Israel, they already have nukes and so does there good friend America.

Some people(Bill O'Reilly) also believe that it is very likely that the US will have to start military action in Iran. And they believe that war would be even more devastating then Iraq. This will never happen. Not enough troops. Besides if they do start a war in Iran, they wouldn't even use troops they would just bomb the shit out of the country. The US wouldn't care about winning over the people of that country.

I read a speech from George W, Bush were he stated that he believed that there is a religious movement going on this world. What kind of Religious movement? Well apparently he thinks that there is a religious movement of people who are supporting him and the war in Iraq. His proof of this is the fact that people have been telling him that they are praying for him. What a crazy asshole.

Well I'm going to go buy an Ipod

I'll Be Calling Out To People Like A Casting Call




The inevitable has happened. It was announced a couple of days ago that there will be a big screen version of The Hobbit. Apparently Peter Jackson hasn't signed on yet to direct, but no one else can direct that movie.


I was covering a shift on the train at the zoo this past Sunday and I ran into an old friend. It was the same old friend you ran into Dave, the one who lives right by you. We had an excellent conversation. I hadn't had a good talk with her for awhile and I really enjoyed talking to her again. She sat upfront and came on a tour with me.

This Friday I'm going to a zoo staff windup. Free supper and bowling. Now I am not the greatest bowler, but I have decided to bring out my inner Lebowski. So I'm going to drink white russians and smoke a J before I go.




I realized that I have not done a political fueled blog lately. So I have decided that the next blog will be all about world politics. So get prepared because I'm going to throw down some mad political knowledge

My trip is coming closer and closer. Last week it all became real when my passport and my eurarail pass came on the same day. I look like a serial killer in my passport photo. Well at least I don't look middle eastern. They totally get racial profiled at airports.

Later

Chris Honcho

I'm Bringing Sexy Back



I would first like to wish all my friends and family who are going back to school a good year. Remember school is cool.

I bought season 2 of LOST yesterday. I have to get my parents caught up on this season before October 4th when season 3 begins. My parents missed the last disc of season 1. They thought the episode where Boone died was the season finally. I got them straightened out.

I also got a new cell phone yesterday. It is much better then my old one. I also switched plans and I now only pay like $20 a month, but I still get a ton of minutes. I decided to take my cell with me to Europe. I won't make calls on it, but I will use it as a clock and alarm clock.

I'm glad to hear you beat Indiana Jones Dave. I know first hand that the last level is insanely tough. You must have spent a lot of time trying to beat it. Kudos.

Later Dudes

In The City Of Compton, We Keep It Rockin'





I had an enjoyable birthday yesterday. I went to the Granary for supper with the fam. I had the Chicken Cordon Blue and salad wagon. Then went back home for presents and birthday pie. I got of bunch of things for my upcoming trip, like a Swiss Army Knife, a small carry on bag, and other small things. I'm having a BBQ at my dad's tonight to celebrate my birth with my dad's side of the family.

After my family stuff was done I went to O'Shea's with Dave. We were met by Twyla and to my surprise Jeff. I thought Jeff was still going to be in Edmonton, it was a nice surprise. Thanks for telling him about the drinking Kim. Bea also joined us. The five of us had some drinks, some laughs, and some good conversation.

I woke up this morning and I was told by my stepbrother that the Steve Irwin "The Crocodile Hunter" had been killed by a stingray. I was in shock. I loved the Croc Hunter. If you scroll down to the previous blogs you will see a picture of Steve.

R.I.P

I Would Like To Thank My Parents For Bringing Me Into This World




Today is the biggest holiday in the religion of Christifanity. The day of my birth. This is like Christifanity's Christmas. So feel free to give gifts to your loved ones and of course to me.

It's hard to believe that I have been alive for a quarter of a century. So many memories.


For all you true believers who want to celebrate with me this evening, me and some of the prophets will be getting together at O'Shea's around 9-9:30pm. Please call me for any further details.

FUNKYBOSS, FUNKYBOSS, Get Off My Back!





Tomorrow is my last full day at the zoo. Will I miss this job? I don't think I'll miss it, but I will look back on this job with mostly fond memories.

I hooked my dad up with an email address yesterday. I then had to explain to him over the phone about gmail and how he could send and check his account. Man am I patient.

Planning for my European vacation has been going well. I got my passport application sent off without any problems. I have a tentative plan of where I want to go. The problem is I would really like to go everywhere, but I don't have the time or the money honey.

Here is a map of Europe to give you guys some perspective. This is the unofficail intenerary:
Land in Frankfurt Germany, spend a few days Oktober festing

Go to the Netherlands, spend a week in Ampsterdam blowing all my money in the Red Light District, then spend another week touring around the rest of the country

Go to Belgium and work on my beer Muscles from Brussels and also go to Bruge where my good frien JB worked

Go to France and check out Paris. Then go to the Normandy region and check out some WWII historical locations

Go to London and hunt for the English Nelson's

Go to Wales and crash with Nicole

Then go to the French Riviera

Go to Spain and learn a little Spanish

Then to Italy to eat delicious food and check out the Vatican

Then a couple days in Greece

Then to Croatia

Croatia up to Hungary

From Hungary to Slovakia

Slovakia to Poland

Poland to Czech Republic

And then Czech Republic back to Germany for my flight home.

Then I spend three days at home before I go to Hawaii and Austrailla for a month and a half.

I'm tired just writing all that.


For all my fellow LOST fanatics. Season Three starts on October 4th. I will be here for the first episode, but then I will miss the next seven. I am going to rely on someone to tape the missed episode for me. I plan on watching them all during my three day visit home. Dave this sounds like a perfect job for you. You have nothing else going on in your life, right?

I'm So Moving On, YEAH YEAH





Last Sunday I went into work and the train wouldn't start. As you could imagine I was crushed over the fact that I did not have to work. So to make myself feel better I went up to Mike's cabin early and surprised everybody.

Mike's cabin was a good time. It was both fun and relaxing which was exactly what I needed. Some highlights of the time at the cabin were swimming, boating, golfing, and being thrown from a golf cart by Mike's dad. Now don't worry I'm fine. I walked away with some bruises and soarness.

If you would like to learn more of the cabin go to Daves blog. The link is on the right.

So apparently the plan of having BC at my work is coming to fruition tomorrow. I honestly didn't think it would happen.



I was talking with Bea today and she commented on this picture below which is on my myspace site. I thought I would share it with the masses. Luke made this little pic.
"I'll see you in heaven, forever baby"

It's The Knick Knack Paddy Whack Still Riding Cadillacs





I am glad to hear that you are coming back to the Toon for a while Gilles. We will definately do some coolin. Ice Cube style

"I make dough, but don't call me Doughboy"

Tomorrow I am heading up to Mike's cabin for a little R&R. It should be a good time. Mike, Deanna and Joel are already up there and Dave, Twyla, and Eli are heading up today. I'm going to drink Eli under the table.

Well I have not much else to say. The zoo hasn't been bothering me as much lately so not to much to bitch about on that front.

Later Christifanians

I'm High On Life, Yeah, I'm Fucking Wasted






Not much new and exciting things happening. I went to the Fringe on Friday with Joel, Mike, and Deanna. Dave was suppose to meet us, but he wussied out. We did some drinking at some different places. A good time was had by all. Mike, Deanna and I cabbed home. We ended up at their apartment where Mike BBQ for us. Your good people Mike Larson.




Dave and I got together on Saturday and had a meeting. Dave beat me at video game hockey. I'm still bitter. It was a fun evening despite the little scare that happened.








dave made me squeal

I'll Be Where The Eagles Are Flying Higher and Higher



The newest thing that drives me crazy at work is when people who sit right behind me on the train talk loudly on their cell phones for the entire tour. I had a lady who did this for the entire zoo and heritage tour. I was ready to punch her. It is very distracting. I very passive aggresively cranked the voulume of my microphone, not only could I not hear her, but I'm guessing she was having problems hearing who ever was on the other line. Thank god I only have a couple more weeks there.


Well its official. I am taking off. Not to the great white north like in that Rush song, but rather to Europe. I leave October 8th. I land in Frankfurt, just in time for Oktober Fest. I will then be backpacking across the continent. Some people may say that I can't hit every country in Europe, I say those people are pessimists and I am a raging optimist. I then comeback to Saskatoon in early February for a few days before I go to Hawaii for M & D's wedding and from Hawaii to Sydney Austrailla for a month of Down Under Debotchery.


This will be me when I'm down there

I Asked You To Go To The Green Day Concert, You Said You Never Heard Of Them, How Cool Is That! So I Went To Your Room And Read Your Diary




The Fjord's beer night was in my opinion a success last night. A lot of people showed up, including Jeff's, Kim's, and Luke's parents. Jim stole the show for a good portion of the night. The best thing Jim did was table pound a beer with Ken (Luke's dad). The worst thing Jim did was puke on a table in front of a bunch of people, fortunately I went to the bathroom just before the puking happened so I missed it. Watching Jim puke seemed to really affect Dave.

As I predicted I got pretty drunk. It was good drunk, I wasn't stumbling around I was just having a good time. I saw some good people who I hadn't seen in a while, like Chris Cotton and Zuri Epp. I also met Kim's parents and I had a nice little convo with them. I also told Bev (Jeff's mom) all about my upcoming trip to Europe. Bev also drove Jeff, Kim, Dave, and I home. That's Solid

I always new Dave was a hippy tree hugger


Here's a pic of me and D. This was when the neck beard was just a dream, now it's a reality.

I Must Confess, My Destiny Is Manifest




I had a stellar weekend. Friday I went to Kaid's birthday BBQ which included a free keg. Free kegs are great. That's the second free keg I have had access to this week. Life is good. I got to see a lot of people who I havn't seen in a while at the par-tay. Your a king Kris Olsen. We'll have that lunch with our mom's real soon. I also met a girl who has made out with both Cavanaugh brothers. As expected I was shocked by this info.

Then Saturday I went to a BBQ hosted by Dave and Twyla at Dave's parents place. This was also a very enjoyable night, but for completely different reasons. I also saw Milo drink from the pond. What a funny kid.

Speaking of kegs of beer, if any of my loyal readers want to go to a Fjord's beer night this Friday let me know. It's at Winston's between 7-9pm. It's $10 bucks per ticket, but you get access to a keg, so its really an awesome deal.


I'll be there, DRUNK OFF MY ASS!

I am officialy at the point of being sick of my tour job. I have become a grumpy bitter tour guide. If people could only read my mind sometimes. I am a mean bastard in my head. Only to those who deserve my venom. I am just so sick of the stupid questions. The closest I have come to being rude is today when some women asked me what time the train was leaving. I was standing by the giant clock that advertises what time the next train ride is, so I said to her in what could be conceived as a rude tone "What does the Clock say" Let's just say that I am glad I have the next two days off, because if I had to work tomorrow I might go off on a person.

What's My Name? G-SPOT!, What Do I Rock? The G-SPOT




I noticed today that I hadn't blogged in over a week. That's just not acceptable. I apologize to all of you.

I havn't had much to blog about my week at the zoo was pretty tame. Nothing terribly exciting or funny. I helped a lost little girl find her Grandma today.

Went to a BBQ with Mike at Mark Ferguson's house this past Sunday. Free keg of beer and delicious food, nothing beats that. I have two BBQ's to go to this week, I love the summer.

My Uncle asked me what I thought about what was happening in the middle east with Israel and Lebanon. My response was that the Middle East was a question that has no answer, it is a total mystery. Like how'd they get the caramel into the Caramilk bar.

Great Middle East analogy, or the Greatest Middle East analogy?

Nice Guys Get Washed Away, Like The Snow And The Rain




So I got an email from a Phd student in Los Angeles who is doing part of her Phd on blogs. She wants me to do a survey. Dave and Luke did you get an email. I was wondering if she sent mass emails to blogger users or she just picked mine. Apparently if I agree my blog will also be used in classes as well. Maybe this will be the first step towards Christifanity becoming the world wide movement I envision. Anythings possible.

I had a stressful day at work yesterday. I am not going to go into great details, but I will just say I got two 10 year old kids banned from the zoo. And I don't feel bad.

To help relieve my stress I went to Superman Returns with Dave and my stepbrother Paul. I would say its a quality picture. Visually pleasing.



We also saw the trailer for Spiderman 3, it looks awesome.

I've Always Had A P.H.D, A Pretty Huge Dick

Remeber when I dropped this line at Mike and Deanna's one night. That was hilarious. I'm Great. It wasn't inappropriate at all

Here is my weekly recap of the interesting things that happened to me at the zoo:

The best thing that happened this week was yesterday. There were these two teenager dudes at the zoo. One was big and tall and the other was scronny. So I'm on a tour and these dicks through some stones at the train. I stop the train and give them hell and tell them I'll have them kicked out if they do it again. So for the rest of the day whenever they would see me doing a tour they would eyeball me. So they decided to walk right past me when I was waiting for someone to get on the train and they eyeball me. Then the big one whispers something to the little one (probably a slam against yours truly) and they start laughing. So I say to them "So are you two on a date", "It looks like you two have some real chemistry", "Are you having a fun date at the zoo" Both of these two losers get all flustered and say stuff like "what" "no" I think the realized that they were messing with a far greater power then they expected and they turned away and walked away. I had thought of the burn earlier in the day and I was happy that I got the oppurtunity to use it.

Thursday when I was in the booth a dude driving an orange VW van tried the old jedi mind trick to convince me that he did not have to pay the $2.00 parking charge. He did the little hand wave and said to me "I do not have to pay the parking charge" My response "jedi mind tricks don't work on me only money" Just like Watto in the Phantom Menace





I watched Revenge of the Nerds yesterday on one of my new TV channels. It was uncensored and hilarious. Every time I think of ROTN I think of day Dave and I spent in Surrey B.C. Good times hey Brown-town



Best shirt ever!

For The Day I Die, I'm Going To Touch The Sky




It was good to talk to Luke and Nicole today. I am glad to hear that you guys are doing well. You are both missed by me. I have no one to go out with anymore.

So yesterday we got Max from sasktel, so we have all these channels now. My stepbrother and I watched this show on my favourite channel National Geographic channel. The show was called "The Darkside of Chimps" And let me tell you that chimps do have a darkside. Chimps are coming in closer contact with humans in Africa and chimps also love meat. So the chimps prey on the weak humans mainly babies and infants. That's right chimps kill babies. Chimps also murder other chimps. They showed actual footage of groups of male chimps who go out on treks to find male chimps from other territories and kill them. It blew my mind.
I thought chimps were cute, now I think there evil. Chimps killing humans is the first step towards Planet of the Apes becoming a reality.


BE AFRAID!

Now I'm Rapping About Money, Hoes, And Rims Again




It's nerd time:

The sequel to The Fantastic Four movie is called "Fantastic Four and the Silver Surfer" That's right Silver Surfer is finally making his big screen debut. Who is playing the Silver Surfer? Nobody, he is going to be all computer generated.

Season 2 of LOST comes out on DVD September 5th.



I am happy to report that I have gotten my mom and stepdad also hooked on the best show on TV. Soon you will all become LOST fanatics.

I'm off to work. Going to go coolin' with my animal homies

Just Like A Prayer I'll Take You There, It's Like A Dream To Me





I have one more thing I forgot to post on my last blog. If any of you are ever in Hague Saskatchewan you must go to the Shell station. The women who works there in a dead ringer for Stephen Harper. That's right a lady Harper. And I am not talking a little like the PM, I'm saying his exact twin. Imagine Stephen Harper wearing pink lipstick and earings



I thought I would also share this picture.


Best Uncle Ever!